Day by day, little by little we are adjusting to this new reality, this new rhythm.  It is an adventure for sure, but it is not easy.  We are still in our temporary house and as a result have now been essentially living out of suitcases for about 4 months.  We are so excited to move in to a place that is more permanent, to create a space in which to live and be.  Monday through Friday we (Kevin, Caleb, and I) attend Thai language school.  Right now we go for 3 hours a day.  It doesn’t seem like much, but it is mentally exhausiting.  At home we study more Thai, explore the city, practice what we’ve learned by shopping, ordering food, and using public transportation.

Learning to grocery shop and feed the family has been a challenge.  Some of the foods we usually eat are unavailable or very expensive (beef and cheese and leafy greens in particular).  Peanut butter, a staple for Caleb, can only be purchased in small quantities.  Real maple syrup is like liquid gold.  Sandwich meat is all processed and bread is all “fluff.”  On the other hand… there are so many fruits and vegetables that we’ve never had access to before.  We just need to learn how to cook them, when to use them and sometimes what they are.  They don’t have most of our most common herbs and spices, but they have a wide variety of others that we can experiment with.  My boys (Kevin included) do love meat and rice and there is an abundance of that here.  There is also an abundance of MSG in food.  They seem to put it in almost everything.  I’ve never seen anything like it!  You can buy bags of it at the store for cooking.  It’s so strange to me.

Getting where we want and need to go is always a process.  It always takes time and usually more time than you think it is going to.  For the most part, we walk to the BTS station (about a 15 minute walk to the station) and then ride the sky train (BTS).  From there we can get to the MRT (subway) or a bus or taxi, depending on where else we need to go.  There is usually a short walk involved once we get off the subway or train.  We walk a lot.  We always have to figure out what will be the cheapest most time-efficient mode of travel based on where we are going and how many of us are going there.  For example, sometimes its less expensive to get a taxi for the four of us than for all of us to pay to take the BTS.  However, the BTS is never held up by traffic, but the taxi might be depending on the time of day.  There are many places the BTS just doesn’t go.  So, we have to decide if we take a taxi the entire way or take the BTS or MRT (or both) and then get on a taxi.  Can we walk to or from the public transit?  How far is it?  Is it raining?  How hot is it?  How much time do we have?

Last Sunday, we intended to go to one church but ended up attending another because we had a very hard time getting a taxi that would take us where we wanted to go.  This was not a communication problem, it was just farther than the taxis wanted to drive on a Sunday and not in a high traffic area where they could get more business after dropping us off.  When we finally got a taxi, we realized that we would be 20-25 minutes late for service, so we had to convince the driver to take us to a different church.  Thankfully we had just learned how to give directions in school the week before! This Sunday we finally made it Bangkok First Church and enjoyed a great time of worship and fellowship.  We told them about our previous week’s taxi experience; they replied with a laugh and a “Welcome to Bangkok.”

Of course, some of our day is spent doing the normal things… cleaning, laundry, etc. which is also different.  There are no clothes dryers so I line dry everything.  This is fine until I decide that the weather looks nice enough to hang things outside (and even check weather.com)—and then it usually rains and the clothes have to be washed or at least go through the spin cycle again.   We have good days where life seems like a fun adventure and not so good days when we really wish we were back home in Oregon with our friends.  Some days we are just plain tired.  Some days it’s hard to remember why we are here amid the endless adjustments and mind-taxing learning.  And then there are days like today.

Today we flew to Chiangmai to pick up our work permits (for the second time—they weren’t ready the first time we went up despite the written notice we’d received that they were).  We met a pastor there who drove us around and talked us about life in Chiangmai and about the hill tribe he’s from and his Karen village.  I had only read about the Karen people in a prayer guide designed for praying for unreached people groups.  Now these people are more than just a picture and a paragraph in a book.  When I pray for them, they are vivid, working, living people who need Jesus.

As we flew home, we were noticing the little villages tucked in among the hills and “mountains” and the not so little cities far off in the distance.  We wondered together about he people there, the Church there, if there even was one.  And then God opened my eyes and expanded my vision.  What if…  What if for the next two years we learn the language and learn the culture and what if while we study and listen and learn, we build relationships and encourage believers.  What if we help disciple and teach and cast Kingdom visions.  What if… what if some of the people we encourage and teach and love catch the vision to go further into their city and out into the countryside, into the other cities and further out into their country and beyond its borders and start new churches, reach unreached people.  What if…

If any of those ifs become reality then all of the adjustments, all that we’ve left behind, all the work of learning will seem like no price at all to pay.  The possiblilites are endless and always amazing with our Great and Awesome God and learning to dream His dreams is inspiring and exciting—because they are more than dreams, they are His plans and His purposes prevail.  So, day by day, I will choose to adjust my life, my attitude and my outlook and vision to His in order to be a part of something far more important than my convenience or even my own ambitions, to be a part of His perfect plan.

When I first heard about the Maetang Tribal Chidlren’s Home, I had so many questions.  First of all, I didn’t really even know it existed until we started learning about the Southeast Asia Field.  So I’m guessing that many of you, especially those of you unfamiliar with the Church’s work here in Thailand may not know much about this place either.  I’m going to share with you the questions I had and the answers I found and in doing so, hopefully I can answer some of your questions as well.

My first question:  What is it?  When I think of a Children’s Home, an orphanage is the first thing that comes to mind.  Are these children orphans?

Answer:  The Maetang Tribal Children’s Home is a Christian boarding home.  Most of the children who live here are not orphans (though we found out that a few are). The children who come to live at the home so do in order to get a better education.  You’ve probably noticed the word “Tribal” in the name of the home.  In Thailand there are several minority groups or tribes that live and exist in Thailand.  They speak a different languages, have a different way of living, cooking and have some different customs.  The children at the home are from these hill tribes.  Right now, a lot of the children at the home are Lahu.  The Lahu people live in the hills where farming is their way of life. There are not adequate schools in the hill tribe villages, so in order to get a good education, the children need to go into the cities.  Maetang is the closest city to this particular tribe but it is still too far to go every day.  The children live at the home during the year while they go to school.

Question #2:  What is the purpose of the home? Why was it started?

Answer:  The Maetang Tribal Children’s Home was started 30 years ago in the home of Sam and Lu Me Yangmi.  Lu Me is Lahu and Sam is Lisu (he was born in Burma).  They shared with us that children from the hill tribes are at a particularly great risk for human trafficking.  This happens for several reasons.  Initially, traffickers would come to the villages promising parents profitable jobs for their children.  Children would then be able to help support their families.  Believing their children were going to work in factories and such, they would send their children away.  Instead the children often ended up in the sex trade.  Alternately, sometimes daughters knowingly sacrifce themselves to work in the sex trade in order to support their families whose farms were failing.  Children who are able to get an education have another option and hope for a future where they can earn a living through education and honest work.  The Yangmi’s started the home to provide a way for the children of the hill tribes to get an education and to come to know Christ.  The most important thing the Maetang Tribal Children’s Home provides is the love of Christ.  Children are introduced to Jesus and the new life they can have through Him.  This makes a world of difference in how they see themselves, the world and their futures.

Question #3:  Does it work?

Yes!  Research has been done to show that in the villages where students have come up through Children’s Home trafficking is almost non existent!  This happpens because children and families have hope for the future.   Lives are being changed as children and parents and sometimes the majority of a village comes to faith in Christ.  In the Lahu village we visited  the majority of families were Christian.  Conversely, students who drop out of the program (usually due to financial hardship) are at a high risk for entering the sex trade.  Jesus makes a such a difference in the lives of these children and their families.

Question #4:  How is it financed?

The Maetang Tribal Children’s Home is financed through donations.  The children can be sponsored through Nazarene Compassionate Ministries.  The goal is for every child in the home to be sponsored.  This money goes directly to house and feed the children. The families of the children are also required to pay a small amount as well.   The staff at the home are largely volunteer and those that are paid are paid a very small amount.  However, they believe strongly in the work being done at the home.

Question #5:  How can the body of Christ help?

Pray for the Children and staff at Maetang.  Pray that more villagers will hear about the home and send their children so that enrollment grows.

Give to the Children’s Home.  Sponsor a child (or two or three).  Donate to create scholarships for students. (email us for info)

Come visit and work at the Children’s Home!  The staff is minimal and there is always work to be done.  The children and staff also need to practice the English they are learning and would love to talk to you and meet you.  Join a Work & Witness trip to Thailand or raise funds and come as a volunteer for a longer period of time.

Email us to find out more about how you can get involved!

We are now back in Bangkok after having spent nearly 2 weeks up north in Chiangmai and Maetang and we now have time to reflect on all that we saw and experienced.  I am going to write about these experiences in two separate posts.  This, the first, will give you a general idea of what it was like to be with our first team and what a Work and Witness team looks like.  The second post, will be specifically about the Maetang Tribal Children’s Home.

Our first team experience has been a really good one.  The team was a group of 11 young women from Olivet Nazarene University and was lead by Phil and Denise Anderson. Denise and Phil both teach at Olivet, but have also lived in Thailand as missionaries.   What a blessing!  They actually lived at the Maetang Tribal Children’s Home for 11 months as volunteer missionaries.  They then went on to serve in the Dominican Republic and in South Africa before moving back to the states to work at Olivet.  They are also beginning a new work: a church plant near Olivet called Communtiy Cup.  We were very blessed to get to know them and glean from their wisdom and experience.

We decided to first meet up with the group at a mall.  We met for dinner to get acquainted and then met up at the airport the next day to fly to Chiangmai.  In Chiangmai, we were met by the Sam and Lu Me (pronounced LooMay) Yangmi.  Sam and Lu Me have been working in Thailand for over 30 years and founded the children’s home we were we would do most of our ministry work.  We spent two days in Chiangmai.  The first night, we dropped our things at the hotel and then went out for dinner at the night Market. May is the beginning of the monsoon season and we definitely experienced it that first night.  The rain pounded down in huge drops that flooded the streets and soaked anyone unfortunate enough to be unsheltered.  It also drove the cockroaches into the open air restaurant where we were eating dinner and trying to converse over the rain.  I saw something scurry across the floor out of the corner of my eye and wondered initially if it might be a very tiny mouse, but it was too small.  I decided that it was probably a cockroach, but decided not to say anything because I didn’t want to alarm the girls over one big bug.  However, they soon discovered them themselves and after the initial screeches, were eating with feet up on the rails of the chairs, while waiters tried to kill and shoo the pests away.  The girls were instructed later not to leave any open bags or suitcases on the floor of the hotel rooms.  I personally never saw any cockroaches in our hotel room, but Kevin said he did see one that was already dead.

After dinner we explored the night market where vendors had set up rows and rows of colorful booths selling everything a tourist could want.  Beautiful clothing, bags, shoes, leather goods, kitchen and housewares, trinkets, t-shirts, and so much more.  I couldn’t even begin to describe everything there.  The majority of the market takes place under canopies so the rain did not deter us from shopping.

On Sunday we all slept in and had lunch out together followed by a meeting with Sam detailing our itinerary and things we needed to know about Thailand. After lunch we changed clothes and went to Chiangmai First Community Church, an international church that many missionaries and expats attend.  Their services are in the evening which allows them to minister locally on Sunday morning and attend a service in English in the evening.  After church, we attended a cultural dinner where we were fed wonderful Thai dishes and were entertained by traditional Thai and hill tribe dances, costumes and music.  It was a feast for the senses!

On Monday morning we checked out of the Chiangmai hotel and drove about 45 minutes to Maetang.  There we checked into another hotel and drove over to the Children’s home.  At the Children’s home, we were introduced to the students and staff and we assessed the work to be done in the coming days.  This team divided their time between working on cleaning and painting the boys dormitories and ministering to the students.  Each morning, while the kids were at school, we would clean walls and scrape railing, prime, caulk and paint.  We would break for lunch and work again until about 3:30 p.m.  The team would then get organized for their time with the students.

Once all of the kids were back from school, around 4:30, we sang songs, taught them a Bible verse in English, and played games and did crafts with them.  It was a really great time of getting to know the students and the staff.   We were fortunate to be with the students at the beginning of their school year and were able to attend their back to school prayer assembly.  We were able to sing and pray with them as they began their academic journey for the year.  After our time with students each day, we ate dinner and went back to the hotel to sleep (and sleep we did).  Dinner was usually either brought in or made for us by our wonderful hosts!

We took a fun day on Friday and went an Elephant camp where we rode elephants, took an oxcart ride, and rode bamboo rafts down a river. It was great fun.  Did you know that they make paper out of Elephant dung? Or that Elephants can paint pictures?

Saturday was spent entirely with the kids, since they were not in school that day, and culminated in a water balloon fight!  It was a fantastic day building relationships with the students.  Our boys fit right in with the Olivet students and quickly became favorites of the children at the home.  They really loved their time there.

Sunday, we drove up to a Lahu village to go to church.  It was a wonderful experience!  We were warmly welcomed by beautiful, friendly brothers and sisters in Christ.  The church is a one room building.  Their choir sang two beautiful songs a capella in four part harmony. Their children’s choir also sang.  Kevin played the keyboard for the congregational singing and was surprised to see that they don’t have music written out in their hymnals like we do.  The music is written in solfegge (that is what most of you know as do, re, mi, etc.).  It is written for them to learn to sing in parts and to learn intervals.   He was able to catch on quickly though and accompany the congregational singing.  Some us had hymnals and could sing along, but others of us had to just listen as they all praised God in the Lahu tongue.  Phil preached a sermon that was translated by Sam and afterward we were all invited to lunch at the pastor’s house where we were fed a traditional Lahu meal, sitting on the bamboo floor eating around small rattan tables.  We had yummy rice, pork, soup, and spicy meatballs followed by home grown tea.

Sunday evening we visited a large Buddhist temple set up on a mountain.  It was ornate and obviously a popular tourist attraction.  There Sam talked to us about Buddhism and how it is practiced in Thailand.  It was sad to see so many people seeking truth and enlightenment and clinging to Buddhism while we know that Truth and Light can only be found in Jesus Christ.

This trip was a great time of learning for us.  We have been able to learn all about the ministry happening at the Maetang Tribal Children’s Home (to be detailed in a later post), we have learned about construction and painting in extreme heat and humidity and what tools and resources are and are not available here.  We have also learned about the different people groups and some of their customs, strengths and challenges.  We look forward to taking more Work & Witness teams up to Maetang and continuing our relationship with the churches there and with the students and staff at the Children’s Home.

Greetings from Chaing Mai, Thailand!  It’s been a long time since my last blog post. I apologize to those of you who have been wondering how things are going.   The month leading up to our move was very busy and filled with so much that blogging took a back seat.  In the end though, we managed to get things in order and to get out the door.  We ended up at the airport with 12 pieces of luggage plus our carry-ons and personal items.  We couldn’t have done this without the help of friends who picked us up and drove us to the airport.  It has been one week since we left the U.S.   Our daughter Lydia left at 6:30 a.m the same Sunday we left at 8:30 p.m.  She is enjoying her choir tour and coming to the end of it when she will fly from Seattle to Colorado to work at Golden Bell camp for the summer.  She is very excited about this and we are excited for her!

While it has been a week since we left U.S. soil, we’ve only been in Thailand 6 days.  We arrived in Bangkok after a very long flight where we were met by David and Naomi Phillips, the Field Strategy Coordinators here.  We checked into our apartment, dropped off our luggage and headed out into the city.  Our first stop was at the BTS station to get transit cards.  These enable us to get around the city by train.  We then headed to a mall where there was a Tesco/Lotus.  This is kind of like a Walmart Supercenter.  There we were able to get SIM cards for our phones, buy groceries, and eat dinner.   After that we headed back to the apartment to shower and rest.  By then it was around 6 p.m.  I managed to stay awake another 30 minutes before falling asleep hard and fast (Caleb may have been out before me).  Noah and Kevin managed to stay up an additional hour.   However, I only woke up once during the night at 3:15 a.m., and was able to go right back to sleep until 5.  Each night since then we’ve managed to stay up later.  So, we’ve been conquering jet lag a little at a time.

We spent the next three days exploring the town, checking out language school and meeting some of our team.  We also visited 3 more malls.  Bangkok has a lot of malls, one of which has a different country theme for each floor (Paris, London, San Franscisco, etc.).  We rode the BTS line from one end to the other to get a little more feel for the city, but that really only scratches the surface.  Bangkok is constantly moving; there are plenty of people, traffic, noises, smells, sounds and sights to overwhelm the senses.

The weather here is hot and muggy, but not nearly as hot as I expected.  I think that’s because we are at the end of the hot season and the beginning of the rainy (monsoon) season.  There have been some cool thunderstorms and downpours.  This is not the season to dry laundry out on the rooftop garden or open balcony (yes, I did learn that by experience).

Currently we are in Chiangmai with a group from Olivet Nazarene University.  Today is our first Sunday and very soon we will be headed to our first church service in Thailand.  Chiangmai is big but much more laid back than Bangkok.  It also has more green space.  Last night we went to the night market and ate in an open air restaurant .  The rain was coming down hard, so the cockroaches decided to join us in the restaurant to keep from drowning.  Unfortunately, several of them met untimely deaths anyway, thanks to quick feet.  Today we all slept in and then ate some wonderful Thai food!  Sam and Lumae Yangmi are our hosts and they are just wonderful!  They have working and serving the Lord in this part of Thailand for many years and we are excited to learn all we can from them.

As we were leaving Central Oregon, a very dear friend’s final words to us were, “Play the grateful game!”  We have been and I thought we would share with you some of what we are grateful for so far:

1.  Safe, uneventful travels. 2. The prayers of our Church Family all over the U.S. 3.  Good health, 4. FaceTime, Facebook, internet access, etc.—so nice to be able to touch base so easily! 5.  God’s Word, it still sustains us every day (our daughter even made us a tin of 365 verses so we could look one up together as a family each day). 6.  The Holy Spirit—our guide and teacher.  7.  Our identity as God’s children  8. The privilege of serving in this capacity and in this place 9.  The body of Christ, both those back at home and the new brothers and sisters we are meeting here.  10.  Our Lord who gives us himself, hears our prayers and provides for our every need.

Prayer requests:

Health: I (Jeni) have come down with a terrible head cold.   Also, my very dear friend’s mom is struggling with her health and is currently hospitalized.  The doctors are having a hard time finding out what’s causing the problems.

The Olivet team:  pray that God works in their lives and in the lives of those they came to interact with through this trip.  And pray that they all stay healthy!

Resources and provision for the work here.

The people of Thailand:  that they would come to salvation through faith in Jesus Christ.
Many more updates are soon to come!  I’ve so much to tell in the next few days!

Jeni

Today I am sitting in my parent’s house is West Virginia, a place I get to visit far to infrequently, and I find myself contemplating the meaning of home. My parents are creating a room in their home for our son to come “home” to on breaks that are not long enough to justify a trip home to us in Thailand.  They are being very intentional about making him feel belongs, is wanted, and has a place.  What exactly is it that makes home…home?  Home is an interesting concept. We long for it.  We spend time and money attempting to create home and we are rarely fully satisfied.  We say, “home is where the heart is,” “home is where you hang your hat” and “there’s no place like home.”   A favorite song about obedience to God’s call has the lyrics:  “I will go and let this journey be my home.”  While all of these things can be true, in my life, I’ve come to learn a different understanding of home.  Our longing for home surely comes from our desire to be at home with the LORD and often we think of this as heaven, but Jesus promised us, in John 14: 23, that “If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching.  My Father will love him and we will come to him and make our home with him.”  How does that work exactly?  How does Christ create home with us?  The Holy Spirit abides/lives in us, surely.  But we’ve recently experienced another, very precious way that our Father provides home.

Early last month we closed on the sale of our house and moved out. We sorted through, boxed up, gave away, sold, shipped and relocated our various belongings. This all happened about a week sooner than we thought and I had planned for one of my oldest friends to come visit me. Because she loves me and because she is such a gracious and flexible person, she just jumped right in and helped me pack. We did very little that could be considered “fun” but I still had a great time just being with her face to face, hearing her voice in person and spending time in her presence. I know I couldn’t have been ready without her help. The finalday, two more very dear friends stepped in and helped me finish and clean the house. They also helped actually clear out items we weren’t sure what to do with. Another friend came to help with the heavy lifting and to drive with Kevin to Idaho where the stuff our daughter can use will live. As Kevin was standing beside the moving van ready to haul our things to their new location, the words came again, “We could never have done this without them!”

As I drove away from my home I was mentally and physically exhausted. I had a brief cry and drove the 25 minutes to the house of friends where we would be staying for the duration of our time in central Oregon. I was tired and just wanted to go home, but I had no home of my own to go to. They offered me theirs. In fact, they insisted that Kevin and I take their bedroom. They encouraged me to take the next day just to relax and rest. I did. Had I not, I might have actually found myself incapacitated.  This space to live and be is something we need.  Once again our friends have provided a piece of our journey we could not do without.

The following day we drove over the mountains to a quiz meet. The final quiz meet that Kevin, who has an incredible passion for Bible quizzing, would get to attend. Our son, also a quiz coach was with us. We already knew it was going to be an emotional day, but then the car decided to have a mind of its own. As we were going around some pretty tight curves, the car began accelerating on its own. Kevin was able to get the car under control, but for the rest of the day, we had no idea what to expect from our car. It was terrifying. We also needed to continue to drive this car to the two churches where we were scheduled to speak that weekend.

I was done in. Again, a friend came. She came and sat with me, just sat and then prayed. She offered her presence and her understanding. She offered her love. I was not alone. It was just ten minutes but it meant the world to me.

The pastors we were going to stay with that night welcomed us, fed us and gave us space to recover and rest. As a result we were able to share and still be enthusiastic about our journey. In the service we received communion, a meal I hadn’t realized I was starving for.  Participating with the Holy Spirit and the Body of Christ in this sacrament renewed me like nothing else could.  We found the same hospitality in home of the next pastor we stayed with. Rest, welcome, nourishment, acceptance, peace.

As we were driving back to Central Oregon, the words came again in the form of a prayer. We couldn’t be doing this without them.

At each church we’ve been to, we’ve been welcomed, nourished, fed, refreshed, We’ve found rest and peace and support. People who’ve offered their homes and presence to our college-aged kids, people who’ve prayed over us, blessed us, embraced us.

We had the privilege of staying with a wonderful family who intentionally created space in their home for just that purpose: to offer welcome, rest, space, peace, quiet, nourishment, support to people in ministry who are far from or have no permanent home. The body of Christ has offered us Home. And the words come again—we couldn’t do this without them, thank you, God.

Here in West Virginia we meet more brothers and sisters in Christ who thoughtfully prepare for our visit and do so much to make us feel welcome and comfortable and to see that we are well cared for.   Our boys are well fed and walk out carrying bags of left-overs.  We are given lovely gifts, warm hugs and friendly smiles.   Grateful is becoming a state of being.

Everywhere we go we find the Body of Christ living out the Word of God:  “Carry one another’s burdens” (Galatians 6:2) and “Therefore, as we have opportunity, we must work for the good of all, especially for those who belong to the household of faith” (Galatians 6:10) and we are so overwhelmingly grateful. Our hearts are so full.

To even begin to recount the number of times God has moved people’s hearts to care for us seems overwhelming. But we’ve become so aware of how God moves His people and how beautiful it is when they respond. Christ sees us, provides for us, embraces us, cares for us through His body. He’s actually holding our hands as we walk this road and those hands are the hands of our brothers and sisters in Christ. This is the Church, this is the Body, This is home.

$2.32.   A treasure given out of a heart moved by God to support us.   A young girl presented us with this treasure in a hand-made envelope with a note saying that this treasure was to use for our mission and that she would pray for us whenever she remembered.  I was incredibly touched.  This wasn’t just any $2.32, it contained a two-dollar bill.  Now, to my kids, those bills were precious and special.  I can only assume that this gift was special to her.  It was given in faith, knowing that it would be used to introduce people to Jesus.

This gift got me thinking about the way children give.  We’ve experienced this with our own children…when led to give, they give without worry or reserve.  Our daughter once emptied her piggy bank for a mission offering.  There was no worry about not having any money left, there was only joy at getting to give.  Children obviously don’t have the worries that adults do; they don’t have to pay bills or meet obligations.  They generally know that their parents will take care of those things.   As adults, we count costs, worry about what will happen if we give everything away, when in reality, we can be relying on our Father to provide for all of our needs.  It seems so simple, yet it feels so complicated, so difficult.  Why?

In the Bible, there was a child who gave away all that he had with him.  A young boy gave five loaves of bread and two fish to Jesus.  Supposedly, this was the only food to be found among thousands of people.  It was at least the only food offered up.  The people were out in the middle of nowhere.  Food and water were not readily available.  Jesus’ disciples were worried and recommended sending the people away to find food.  Yet this boy willing gave his life-sustaining food to the master.  I wonder, though, what he thought as he watched was Jesus did with his gift, his offering.  He most likely thought that he was giving food to feed the master, to feed Jesus.  A sacrifice, but one he could be proud of.  What did he think as he watched Jesus tear it apart and give it away?  Was there a moment when he thought, “Wait, that isn’t what I gave that for!”  or did he just trust and watch in wonder as his small offering became a miracle?  A miracle that blessed thousands and provided for the giver as well.

It’s interesting to me the process by which the miracle occured.  In order for the food to become a miracle, it first had to be offered, torn up, broken, and given away.  This offering up and breaking is also the process by which the miracle of salvation was worked on the cross.  One life offered up, torn up, broken, and given away brought life to all who would receive.

In this process of moving and leaving and saying goodbye, we’ve had to give many things up to God: our church family, our ministry, our own children, our finances, the future.  Things that represented nourishment and security to us, things that blessed us, things and people that were treasures to us.  Of course, we have ideas about what we want God to do with those things, ideas about what it should look like; we know how we think it should go.  But when we release our treasures to God we give up our right to say how they will be used.  As hard as it is, we have to be willing for God to break them and give them away—for God to break us and give us away.  When we surrender our lives we have to be willing for God to do things that we don’t anticpate, expect or even understand if we want our offerings to become miracles.  And we do.  We want to see our offerings multiplied.  We want to see God’s kingdom come.  We pray, “Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done…”  The two cannot be separated.  His kingdom can only come His way, in His time.   That’s the way a kingdom works: the King is in charge.

That $2.32?  It will from this time on remind us that we are to give like a child, trusting that we can give without fear or worry, that we can trust our Father to do what is best.  We will also remember that our treasures, our gifts and offerings can be multiplied, can become miracles when we let them go and watch in wonder at what God will do.

Psalm 121, it’s a pretty short psalm, but like the rest of God’s word, it really packs a lot of meaning into a few words.  Every now and then I get a tad anxious about everything we will face once we leave the U.S.  Last night was one of those times.  I was anxious about adjusting to the Eastern/Thai culture.  I was almost more anxious about adjusting to the missionary culture and how to work well and connect with the people with whom we will be working.  We’ve been packing.  I’ve been trying to sort through what to bring and what to leave behind and what to sell or give away… so many details.

But this morning I awoke to psalm and an accompanying wave of peace:

I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip—He who watches over you will not slumber;

indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord watches over you—the Lord is your shade at your right hand;

the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all harm—He will watch over your life;

the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Here’s how I heard it:

I look up for help, I need help now and will need help.  Where does it come from?  From the Lord (of course).  He is the best source of help.  He made heaven and earth; there is nothing He can’t do.  He’s an expert on every subject and all resources are available to Him.

My God won’t let me slip; He won’t let go of my hand, but will hold me steady.  He will constantly watch over me at all times. I am not alone, nor will I ever be.

He is my shade (I looked this up.  Apparently, this is a middle eastern expression for protection from oppression (‘cause heat is oppressive)).  I have protection against spiritual oppression! 

The sun will not harm me by day (I will not die or faint from the heat-nor anything else in Thailand; it will be great!), nor the moon by night. 

The Lord will watch over my life and keep me from harm both now and forever more.

God’s promises are so amazing and His Word just has a way of speaking into my life in just the right way at the right time. 

I’d love to how God’s Word is speaking to you.  When you read this Psalm, how does it speak into your situation?  Is there another verse or promise from God’s Word that has been given to you lately? Can’t think of anything right now?  Go dig into His Word and listen and get back to me 😉  

Have a wonderful week resting in His promises.

We put our house up for sale on a Saturday.  By Monday we had our first offer.  By Wednesday we had accepted a full price offer. I should have been rejoicing, and part of me was. We made money on this house. I should have been overjoyed to see God at work on our behalf (we were making money on this sale that God could use).  A big part of me was.  But another part of me wept.  I sat in my car and cried.  At first I told myself that I was just overwhelmed, it was all happening so fast.  But, it was more than that.  I felt like I was selling my blessing.  This house that we live in was God’s blessing to us.  We were able to buy it at the bottom of the market (literally the rock bottom).  As a result, when money was scarce and budgets were stringent, we were okay.  Our house payment was ridiculously low.  Our home was heated with the wonderful warmth of a wood burning stove and the garden provided an over-abundance of produce.  This home has been a place of refuge, a sanctuary and a place of peace and calm.  It has been a blessing.  The thing is, it was meant to be a blessing for a specific time not forever.  It was what we needed to have and, for a time, God used this blessing to increase our knowledge of Him and to grow our faith.

It reminds me of the time Jesus and three of his disciples went up a mountain.  There Jesus was glorified.  There they saw Moses and Elijah.  It was a huge blessing.  It revived the souls of the disciples who were there.  It increased their faith and they grew in their knowledge and understanding of who Jesus was.  Peter wanted to stay on the mountain, to live in the blessing, to make it his home.  But it was not to be.

Our blessings, with the exception of our Lord himself and an eternity in heaven, can never be our home (even if the blessing is a house).

The Bible tells us that this world is not our home.  Right now the journey in the presence of Jesus is the closest thing to home we get.  And it’s more than enough.

So, I dried my tears, thanked Jesus for the blessings that had been, and released them back to Him so that I could receive the blessings to come. Not just the profit from the sale of the house, but whatever God chooses to send our way.  As we pack items and mark items to give away and sell, I can thank God for the use of these things in my life, but these things are not representations of our life here or possessions that express who we are, they are just things.  Our life, what we’ve done, where we go, who we are is Christ and Christ alone. The gifts are His, they’ve always been His.  And gifts from God’s hand, whether they coming or going, are always good.

The past two weekends we have travelled east from Central Oregon to Nampa, Idaho.  If you have been aware of the weather at all, you know, this really isn’t the best time to be driving all over the place.  It’s snowy and icy, and turns long drives into longer ones.  Coming back from Idaho, we encountered weather we did not expect: fog.  It was night and the fog was so thick that we could only see about two and half, maybe three feet in front of our car.  We knew we would have to drive more slowly due to the “spots of ice” and packed snow, but this took us down to a crawl.   What do you do when you don’t know if there are deer or cattle roaming across the road? When you have no idea how far ahead of you the next car is or how fast it’s going? What do you do when you can’t see what’s in front of you, but you still have to go on?

Life is so much like this sometimes, isn’t it?  We have clear days when it seems like we can see far into the future, the road is mapped out for us, we can see potential dangers as they come up and react well in advance, we know where to go and can see how to get there.  Then there are times when we are fogged in.  The natural reaction is to stop or turn back, to wait until the fog clears.  When we were caught in fog my first reaction was to turn back and wait until morning, but Kevin felt confident that we could move forward.  Often that’s what we are called to do, to move forward into the mist and through the fog.  Why did he feel confident in doing this?  Because we were on the same road we’d been on when it was clear.  The fog did not change the reality of the road, just our perception.  Though it was much harder to tell how far along we were, we still knew how to get home.  We did have to go slowly, cautiously, but that’s not such a bad thing.

Sometimes God gives us a vision for our future and then the vision gets cloudy, fog rolls in.  We start to doubt the path He has set us on and we want to turn back, we want to be able to see what He has promised.

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” (Hebrews 11:1)

Faith is what keeps us moving forward, knowing that what we hope for is there even though we can’t see it.  God has given us a vision for ministry in Southeast Asia, a promise that we will get to participate in the building of His kingdom there.  He has promised to provide for our needs.  When things seem to get fuzzy and the details don’t seem to be working out as we desire, it isn’t because the reality of what He’s called us to do has changed.  Sometimes, it does mean that we slow to a crawl, even a long pause, but we won’t turn back.  We have very little idea of what actually lies ahead in this situation, just the assurance that our all-knowing God is preparing the way for us to walk in, He’s making our paths straight.  So we will creep along in the fog and pick up speed on the clear days knowing, not hoping, that we are still on the road home.